To Rule Mankind and Make The World Obey...

I don't watch TV, really. Most of the shows I like get canceled early into their run, and I have a deep distrust of commercials, do to my fear that my last dying thoughts will be the jingle for "Chicken Tonight". This is a bit rough when trying to make conversation. I can deal with "have you ever seen" well enough, but "did you catch" is just a prelude to a 'no'.

The only thing that has saved me from total television hermitage has been the DVD seasons. No commercial breaks, no hoping in vein for your favorite rerun, just your TV Shows when you want to watch them. MST3K has another box set out next month. I've now seen every episode of "Kolchack: The Night Stalker" and the ill-advised reboot. And then there's HBO.

My exposure to HBO in my youth was limited to my parents occasionally reminding me they had it before I was born - the point being that they could afford it before they had me. So I had figured that I had ruined everything or it had been one bloody expensive channel.

To this day, I'm not sure which was the case...what was I talking about? Right! HBO!

Brilliant channel, really - they tend to get out of the shows way and let their creators tell their story and then stop. No dragging it out for nine unfunny seasons of "comedy" or dull, lifeless drama (so long as you don't count the middle seasons of most long run series). And I'm slowly catching up on the marvels they have done up for themselves. Having gone through "The Wire" (one season too long, but a great ending), I have started in on "Rome".

I've only seen a few episodes here and there, and thanks to the influence of my brother, I had a good enough understanding of the history of Rome to bound from episode on to five and not be too far off in guessing the year it takes place in.

Which is all well and good, but now that I'm neck deep in season one, I must say I've missed a bloody lot. Everything about the series is perfect, like "I, Claudius" having a lucid moment during a meth binge. And it has Ian McNeice, one of my favorite character actors (seriously, no one oozes austerity and decay like Ian McNeice). There's only two seasons, though.

Amazing show.