When I worked at [redacted] we had a major push for the "Twilight" films. Which bothered me because - well, everything bothers me. But it was for the same reason I grumbled about suddenly selling Lady Gaga and Justine Beiber merch. - I wasn't upset that the store was changing their image away from the one I tolerated, but that we were going with the one thing I couldn't stand - ubiquity. Twilight, Gaga, der Beiber - they were everywhere - every time I opened the internet, turned on the radio (NPR, bless my twisted, granola munching heart), or had a conversation with my friends at bars more known for cheap-even-for-a-retail-check beers. The friends would talk about one, the jukebox would play the others, and I'd leave painfully sober and aware that, once again, I was behind the socio-acceptable curve.
Normally, I'd be fine with it. Hell, I'd been fine with it throughout my life - I was the living embodiment of walking in five minutes after the movie started and sitting in silent confusion. The thing was, there had always been tons to be confused about - stuff from my elders, my peers, and the (creepily growing) youth - so I could find something that I liked and then hurry to catch up. This worked well - one of the perks of being a geek during the internet's great leap outward was that I could follow up on everything I wanted to know about. I had instant access to the complete history of comic books, could parse Neal Stephenson's sentences, and speak at great length about the histories of two empires (one historical, one fictional). It also expanded my horizons - fed my growing interests in films, books, the cultures of archipelago nations, different forms of government, Buddhism, Taoism, Chaos magic, Chaos theory, string theory, N-space, the difference in output between Wizards of the Coast and White Wolf games, why the phrase "there are no wolves in Ireland" is impossibly loaded in America and kind of meaningless in Ireland. I saw places that I still dream of going, read the blogs and watched the vlogs of people from all over and felt connected.
I felt less alone, which for me was incredibly important (being both intro-and-extroverted). When Veronica Melching mentioned Henry Rollins to me, I went from blank faced to utterly obsessed in the space of a weekend (damn, I should have asked her out). But, in feeling less alone, I also understood that these things were not "mine". I couldn't complain about a band sounding different, or an author experimenting in "big idea" fiction rather than genre work - because I kept reading what other people thought, seeing the little kernels of the ideas, themes, and future works buried in their past catalog.
But now (which is actually then), I was sitting in the store meeting, learning that the company was requesting (this was not mandatory) that the staff read the Twilight books so that they would know just what the fuck the customers were talking about. And I winced because I wince a lot, and also because I'd take the bate. I had to. It's not right to mock something you don't understand/aren't willing to try. And I mock everything. So I hopped on trusty internet sales floor number 354 and scanned the used book prices. Finding that I could have almost the complete set for five bucks (plus shipping and handling) and complete the set for twenty (I'm rounding down), I ordered and waited and thought of different ways to get out of this. I needed the twenty for gas. But it was gone. And soon enough the books arrived.
Finally, I knew why almost everyone was talking about the Twilight saga. I read it through once, then skimmed through again. Taken as a study of the adulthood culminating from a lifetime of repression and shaming, it's actually very interesting - what Stephen King's Carrie would have written if she had lived long enough. There is a palpable fear of the outside world, and the Mormon themes were pretty clear (having devoured Battle Star Galatica [first incarnation] fan pages) - right down to the persecution by forerunners who didn't understand how flawed their outlook and actions were, and hostile relations with natives touched by the same divine power as the "good guys".
Sure the writing was "childish" - but that played into the theory of repression, of letting the id try to run wild before slamming it down with all the psychological force a single person can bring.
...yeah, that wasn't what people were talking about. That was what I talked about. I would talk about abusive relationships, controlling partners, and my deep seated fear of a lack of irony to reading the series.
Now, though...
Now the film series is finally ending. Stephanie Meyers isn't threatening to write another book as often (this is not as comforting to me as it sounds). And the banner was potentially replaced by Hunger Games (here's hoping) or possibly the work of Maureen Johnson (here's really hoping) in terms of teen fiction and summer movie escape.
But rising from the almost filled grave, like the vampires they reassembled, has come the fanfictions.
For those not in the know - fan fiction/fanfic are not a new thing. In a nutshell, they're the stories you know taken over/continued/"fixed" by fans of the series. Some of them are good. Some of them are, in fact, amazingly good. But most of them are on a sliding scale of "meh" to "bad" with a fair share of "why the fuck would anyone do this" outliers screwing up the bell curve. There is also the "Mary Sue" aspect of fanfics - the creation of a character suspiciously powerful to the point of being god-like. They tend to be extremely popular (especially with the author's favorite character - with sexy results), accomplished at anything they attempt, and have a character arch of a 180 degree angle. They exist as a kind of wish fulfillment, an escape from the ordinary world to a place the author would rather inhabit, in a body, with a mind, and with the people, the author wishes they had.
I am not completely against this. I'm fine with folks having these fantasies, and I'm fine with them putting them out on the panopticon. For the most part, it seems (to me) like a harmless bit of fun, provided the authors can weather the replies.
Then Fifty Shades of Grey came out and suddenly I hate you all.
We are back among the ubiq - poorly written, plotted like a seventy's porn film, and a major "Must See TV" event. It started life as a Twilight fanfic, but with the correction to the "no sex" of the books (save the last one which is...disturbing, at best). Nope - now there's barely three paragraphs without sex. Which is fine - I remember sex fondly, and can see why people would like such a thing.
But, again, it's everywhere, for one of two reasons - people either love it, or they hate it.
The only really astounding part to me is the fanfic part - not the Escher like "there is a fanfic with fanfic" thing, which I'll leave to far more accomplished minds - but that something, written by a fan, which totally flies against the tone of the books that inspired it (while also, weirdly, hitting damn near all of the themes fans hate to discuss) has been embraced by the same group of fans, now slightly older.
And thus, we come to my scheme...
I'm a big fan of two, very geeky, things: Warhammer 40,000 and Wraith: The Oblivion. The former is a table top game who's back story is being filled in the Horus Heresy series of books, the latter was a pen and paper game about the afterlife (which sounds cheery, until you read the title).
Warhammer 40k started out as "JRR Tolkin and Frank Herbert got drunk, watched all of the big cultural touchstone Science Fiction films since 1984 and decided to write a violence heavy novel" - I'm honestly not kidding. The universe depicted is one where the best thing that can happen is that one of the "good guy" species kills you because, otherwise -well, death is not the end, although you will wish it was. The big bad of the series, the legions of Chaos (please note capital letter), are being controlled by gods (for want of a better term), and the very emotions evoked in battle, in fighting them, and in some cases even thinking of them, feed their growing legion. Die at their hand, and guess who just got drafted into their army!
The Horus Heresy books tell of the rise of the Chaos legions, and the beginning of...somehow making a universe almost completely under the control of an undying fascist dictator worse.
What I like about the books, though, is how they handle their themes - betrayal is the result of betrayal. Loyalty is debated even among those who cannot fathom a different focus to their lives. The rise of genetic engineering is halted at "for military use only" leaving much of the general population dependent upon the whims of those now almost completely removed from the human fold, and the effect this has on both the humans and their overlords. The role of combat in the history of humanity, and it's inescapable pull. The frailty of some beliefs, and the strength of others - the benefits of religion and of atheism. There's even a comedy series (Ciaphas Cain) that's basically Black Adder Goes Forth...IN SSSPPPPAAACCCCEEE!
So, I've decided to do a fanfic of Warhammer 40k. But I want to explore the themes of Wraith: the Oblivion.
As it takes place in the afterlife, Wraith dealt with alot of what I was going through at the time, and what I continue to go through. Themes of guilt, forgiveness and lost chances, of separation, finding your place and using negative emotions constructively because otherwise the voice in the back of your head will murder you...again, I'm not kidding - it's one of the rules of the game, your Jungian Shadow will murder you. All of this, rolled around with the shock of finding yourself alive (kinda) after a traumatic event, a life unfinished. It made for some moments that I and my fellow geeks found deeply moving, cathartic, and...well, life affirming. Which meant that, to us at least, the game was a smashing success (a fun bit of trivia, the editor in chief described Wraith as "the game of giving a damn").
So, that is the basis of #fanfictofame. I'm going to try and troll the mass market paperback world. If this works, I'll become everything I hate, without the whole, you know, decaying sense of self and overall need to remain true to my inner life.
As always, I remain,
Your Host
